Be Available for (Magic Moments)

Do you know what “Magic Moments” are? These are the times when you are together and suddenly your child wants to talk. It is when they invite you to enter their private, inner life and let you know their deepest thoughts and personal concerns, and ask life-changing questions. Magic Moments could happen during vacations, shopping, playing basketball or other sports, eating or resting together, or driving them to school or riding in the car together.

You can’t just insist, “Sit down, let’s talk.” It does not work that way with young people. Your son or daughter might even be thinking, “Here comes another lecture!” You need to be available for Magic Moments to happen.

Magic Moments cannot be forced, imposed, or demanded

These moments just happen. The more time you spend with your children, the greater the probability of Magic Moments. You’ll never regret the experiences you’ll share with each other. Your time with your children and your emotional involvement in their lives are priceless.

Magic Moments are not always there. You must grab them when they come.

Spend time doing what they like to do, not always what you like.

Spending time with children does not mean going out together to do things that they don’t like. Rather, spend time together doing things that they enjoy. Make sure that they will have a good time. When you ask them out to eat, remember that while you may like healthy, gourmet food, your children might prefer “fast food.” Don’t take them to the salad bar unless they really like salad! As they get older, they might learn to like what you enjoy.

Do your children have “Magic Moment” memories with you? Be available doing what they like to do, and you will discover their Magic Moments.

This is an excerpt from Motivate: 8 Secrets of Successful Parenting by Peter and Deonna Tan-Chi. This book is available at OMF Lit and Passages Bookshops, PCBS, and our online store, passagesbooks.com for P350.